24/7 Gratefulness

So lately my life has become amazing. I am just really seeing God's vision for me unfold in so many ways right now. First, I have resumed my work as an pro-life activist with Rock For Life. I have begun volunteering for them again and was even lucky enough to participate in a t-shirt photoshoot. Besides that, I just enjoy working for them because I know I am helping to push forward the cause of Life. Whether its doing a photoshoot, holding a sign, or doing office work, my heart is filled with a passion for this cause and I believe it is part of my calling. I have also, while working with Rock For Life, been able to make a new friend who is just amazing, is a strong Christian and just shares alot of my interests. She is truly an answer to prayer. And finally, I have begun doing more blogs as part of my youth ministry work and that is also a calling that God has placed on my life. (Plus as a small side note, there is a cute guy who works at a rental store who has made my girlish heart flutter a tad. Nothing serious though, Just nice.)However, before I get caught up with all of these wonderful blessings, I am remind of how much I need to keep holding onto God. It is tempting when life begins getting better to forget about how God has an active part in our lives. Sounds weird but it is. We cling to God constantly in our struggles but when things get easy, I think sometimes we get spiritually lazy. We forget who brought us the good things. So I am making a resolution today to remember God's goodness in all seasons.

high goals

So I'm learning the thrill of high goals. Why short suit yourself? I love working towards a goal. Goals give me the push to keep going sometimes. 3 examples: Theres a contest at work. Theres no big prize or anything, but I LOVE it! We are trying to see how many of certain items we can sell (it make the check average higher). I've sold so many and its become like a fun competition for me. (and high check average means higher tips too) (made 19.27 an hour tonight!). Another goal: I've wanted to be a cici's manager, but who would higher a 19 year old....well come to find out my boss was hired at 18 and a certain boss recently got fired. I want the job. Its a goal; something i would love to achieve. Recently, I was depressed about my finances cuz all my college bills are due and i thought I'd have no money left. I wanted to quit. why pour money into some dumb schooling? Well i found out that i will have money left and that many kids have to take out $100,000 loans and still manage do it. So Im even ahead of them. And even if I dont make a career out of my major, Ill still have the degree, the accomplishment, the experience, and the "i reached a goal" feeling.

I'm a Thinker, not a Fighter.

I love to think. Not about anything in particular usually its just like my brain doesn't have a speed limit. I think and think and think. In turn, I love things that make me think like certain movies and music. Sometimes in the process of studying these topics and thinking about them, I like to argue. I'm not looking for a fight and I don't have some sadistic obsession with prodding people, I just like to argue and disagree sometimes for the heck of it. It's like a stimulation of the brain for me. So maybe I should warn people, I like to argue but I don't like to fight.

Just something I was thinking about =)

anyone here?

More posts! Another blog?

Our Collective Idea
a new blog (by me) The basic idea of the blog is to have links to different creations I/or others have made. Go ahead and check it out, so far there is only a ring tone that I made but check it out... and post more on My Dear Beast!

Staying Busy?

So right before the school year started back in late August, I had an entire week off to do whatever I wanted. It was the last week of summer, and the pool where I work canceled lessons for the week, so I litterally had no responsibilities and was looking forward to a week of complete relaxation. Sounds like a good deal right? Not quite. I don't know if you guys have ever felt this way before, but as soon as my schedule freed up, not only did I become unmotivated and lazy, but I also started feeling depressed. DEPRESSED! Who gets depressed at having all the time in the world to do what they please? But that's exactly what happened; by the end of the week I couldn't wait for it to end. It wasn't quit the vacation I had imagined, but why?
A few weeks later I was driving to my second job after just clocking out of my first one. This was by far going to be the busiest week I had seen in a long time: I was working 2 jobs in the morning and evening, doing schoolwork in between, and trying to fit in my other commitments, which included spending time with friends of mine who would soon be moving to the West Coast. So during the drive in between jobs, I could've grumbled about how busy I had become and how I didn't have any free time to do anything. But instead I found myself doing exactly the opposite. I was happy for the first time in over a month! Somehow I had broken the curse, and I realized: to stay happy, I have to stay busy. Not busy to the extent that it becomes unhealthy and I begin to neglect my family or friends and even stop taking care of myself. But busy enough to feel accomplished and challenged and satisfied, things that can be vital to our well-being.
The saying that comes to mind is "Idle hands are the devil's tools." If we're not working toward anything, aren't we missing out? Just something to think about :)

Teh Spoon say Woot

Sir Scrubs-A-Lot Reporting for Duty

Can I get a woot?

I just really wanted to post here. I miss the kind of community we all had before. Remember those skype chats? Those were the days. Is anyone on here still interested in having that kind of group back together. I know stuff has happened since then and we are all kinda busy but is there any chance we can make this work? I am willing to try. I really like having a group of friends Ic an just talk to about stuff whether its funny or serious. I love bouncing things off everyone who takes part in this blog and who took part in the skype chat. So if you're willing to try and revive "the group" again, lets hear a woot.

A note to Depression: "You Shall not PAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSS!!!"

Most of the time its a pretty crappy realization... Depression having many different forms and ways of entering ones life.

Family...
Friends...
Work...
And the occasional "Just because"...
It can really mess anyone up. So throughout my early life I found depression to be a "common" feeling... Showing that I was happy or angry was a sign of weakness or an unattractive quality in friendship. Making other people laugh was really the only thing I felt that was "right" or "good". Sharing ones weakness or fault felt like a huge mistake, and often this proved to be true. Life felt like a bleak colorless world filled with people who allowed themselves to succumb to their feelings or emotions and I as a person God called to keep his mind clear.
Drugs never seemed appealing to me. I could never see myself doing crack or any sort of medication, and even cold medicine or pain killers seemed like a stupid and weak way to deal with discomfort or pain. Really dealing with pain or sickness was a way to seem strong, tho I felt not to show that I was sick or in pain, but alas limping or coughing is rather ... obvious.
I feel as if I have veered off topic. Anyway... Depression has had a foothold in my life. Allowing me to be held down to bitterness, anger, jealousy, fear, and some others I care not to mention.
Recently I have found a foothold in happiness and joy... and I have to say it feels good... So now for a LOTR reference ...
Depression ... YOU SHALL NOT PASS! Also can you take your stupid friends with you?